Comedy of errors….

"On packing: Lay out all your clothes and all your money. Then, take half the clothes and twice the money." - Susan Butler Anderson

My over packing has reached new heights. Though in my defense, when I was with my girlfriends last night I said that I thought I should go though my suitcase one final time, as I was sure there were things in there I didn’t need. They told me that I shouldn’t, I was going to be in Costa Rica for 5 months and needed everything I had packed. I blame them, and not only for my suitcase being too full, but also for the headache I had this morning when I had to get up after 4 hours of sleep. Yes, they forced me to drink wine.

So this morning Hot Neighbor came over to drive me to the airport. He already knew I was an over packer because he had previously had the misfortune of carrying a suitcase for me… at which time I am sure he wished he wasn’t my neighbor. And if that last time didn’t do it, this time certainly did.

Last night when I talked to him I warned him that I needed him to carry a very heavy suitcase down the stairs for me today. He, in his usual kindness, said no problem. Maybe he had forgotten about carrying my suitcase up the stairs for me when I returned from England after Christmas. Clearly my banana bread has magical powers.

For those of you who have not had the pleasure of meeting Hot Neighbor, I will tell you he is very athletic and fit (which certainly contributes to his title of “Hot Neighbor”), so I was pretty confident that the suitcase would not present any problem for him. I mean he is Hot Neighbor after all, surely that comes with some super-powers. In his defense, it wasn’t so much of a “problem” as a “pain in the ass.” Keep in mind, Hot Neighbor was in a suit as he was dropping me off at the airport on his way to work. As he was carrying the suitcase down 3 flights of stairs he commented that “this thing must weigh 80 lbs.”

As it turns out, Hot Neighbor has more to offer than just his good looks and kind personality, he is also is great at estimating weight. Good thing I never had him carry me because I have been lying to the DMV for years.

When we put the suitcase on the weight scale at the airport it was 81 lbs. I couldn’t believe it, 81 lbs? Clearly my morning Crossfit workouts have paid off because while it seemed heavy to me, I thought I could maybe do a “thruster” or 2 with it. Not so much, but I could squat it, I am sure of that.

Anyway, upon weighing my suitcase, the baggage handler told me that they wouldn’t allow anything over 70 lbs on the plane. I said “Can’t I just pay for the extra weight?” at which time he told me they charge for anything over 50 lbs and won’t let anything over 70 lbs on.

Houston we have a problem.

Especially since my “small” suitcase was 52 lbs. Yes, that is right; I packed 133 lbs of stuff to take to Costa Rica. If any of you are particularly surprised, please be reminded of my 13 pairs of shoes for the 2 week trip. This trip is for 5 months!

The good news is, I didn’t cry or feel the need to call my Mom bc I was sure I could fix this situation. So, I kindly asked what my options were, and he suggested that I remove some of the things from the suitcase to put in a box (which he was willing to provide) and check the box, having 3 pieces of luggage for an additional charge. Perfect.
Luckily for me, the airport was not crowded, there were no lines, and I had a very friendly and helpful person assisting me.

So we went back outside to the sky cap area and he got a box and told me to start unloading some things into the box. As a reminder, I needed to unload 30 lbs of things into this box, this was no small feat. So there I am, unpacking my suitcase in front of two very kind sky cap attendants, who generously only made fun of me a little. While I was a little embarrassed, I felt ok about it. This was not my first rodeo. Then the security guard walked up and stood there and watched me while shaking his head. Judgy bastard.

So I unpacked a significant amount of things from my suitcase to place in the box. This included 7 pairs of flip flops and more tank tops that I will most likely need (I said most likely). By the time I got my suitcase down to 50 lbs, it was almost empty. Why do they make suitcases that will hold 85 lbs of stuff if they won’t let you take said suitcase on the plane? Must be a conspiracy.

The kind skycap then took the suitcases and the box inside (on a cart mind you) to be checked and weighed. While he was doing his thing, I pulled my credit card out as I was prepared to pay the $100 to bring the box. However, to our surprise the agent who checked me in told me that since I was flying first class, I was allowed to check 3 items, so it didn’t cost me a thing. Hooray, my first traveling success. But unfortunate for them, as they now made it clear that not only can I over pack my 2 items, I can now bring a 3rd. They are going to regret that.

However I will be honest and say am a little concerned about how I am going to get all of these items off the luggage claim, through immigration and out of the airport. I am hopeful they have the luggage carts in Costa Rica.

Cost of having Hot Neighbor carry my suitcase down the stairs and drive me to the airport:
Zero $.

Cost of tipping the sky cap for providing me with excellent assistance and a box:
$20.

Having everything I “need” available to me in Costa Rica:
Priceless.